He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
