Buhtt sex?
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Randomize
