i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I would fuck him just for his dog
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
