found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
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