So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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