threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
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