.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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