I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
