i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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