Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize