Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..

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(859): View more from Kentucky

Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???

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(614): View more from Ohio

There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.

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(423): View more from Tennessee

In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name

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(828): View more from North Carolina

You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...

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(256): View more from Alabama

Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.

(773): View more from Illinois

You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.

(608): View more from Wisconsin

I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.

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