ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
