Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
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