i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Randomize
