I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
