I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
My penis needs a shock collar
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Randomize
