Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
We're like a lot better than the average bears
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Randomize
