Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
