Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Mom said you looked used
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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