you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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