Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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