Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize
