i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
