Kiss
Puke
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
