The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
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