Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
