we're blogging at a bar
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Randomize
