But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I need to calm my uterus...
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
