we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Randomize
