Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Randomize
