There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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