Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
