Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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