We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
