Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
You should frame my arrest warrant.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
