stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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