Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
