nut hugger
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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