Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
