i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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