it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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