isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
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