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I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
last night I used snow as a chaser
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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