k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize