okay pat passed out under dana's car
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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