wakey wakey hands off snakey
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Fuck appropriateness.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I think a kid would responsible me up
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
