we made out on top of his cat.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
