it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Randomize
