I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Randomize
