i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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