tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
