It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
