I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize